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Posts Tagged ‘managing stress’

Using Emotional Intelligence to Build Teams and Reduce Workplace Stress

Sunday, April 12th, 2009

I get a lot of information from the Harvard Business Review papers. Here I find much of the latest research about stress, workplace stress, work behavior, emotional intelligence and a range of other important organizational factors. There is a consistent theme that emotional intelligence is one of the most essential attributes promoting (or denying) your effectiveness in the work place. Their recent research points to the important role of what they call ‘group emotional intelligence’ in meeting organizational goals and objectives. Given the amount of emphasis in most organizations on collaboration and team work this is not surprising. Obviously, if people working on a team have high levels of self-awareness and ‘other’ awareness (being able to understand and use strategies to work with the personal styles of team members) then the team will have greater harmony and increase productivity.

Many of us work in teams that are very productive; some of us work in teams that are hostile and interfere with productivity and satisfaction. Some of the key characteristics that I will describe briefly about emotional and group intelligence include the following: social responsibility versus irresponsibility; impulse control versus uncontrolled outbursts; and stress tolerance versus stress in tolerance.

Social Responsibility

At work, as in relationships, you have certain choices you can make. You can act like a mature, thoughtful, empathic, and responsible person or you can indulge what Freud called in his personality theory the id. This nasty little piece of who we are was described by Freud as blind, instinctual, irrational strivings. If you give in to your id responses, you will show very little social responsibility and you will become an aggravating and difficult colleague. Being prepared to give and take, to understand the other person’s point of view, to maintain perspective and keep a larger view, and be generous in your relationships with others will increase harmony and decrease workplace stress for you and your colleagues.

Impulse Control

One of my research areas is ADHD and a key characteristic of some people with ADHD is a diminished capacity for impulse control and self-regulatory management. Unfortunately, there are too many people in the workplace who show a reckless disregard for even a small amount of impulse control. They seem to believe that they have an incontestable right to vent their emotional eruptions whenever they feel like it and without regard to others. The converse of this is the responsible person who doesn’t elevate other people’s stress levels but carefully and effectively deals with the pressures and stress that they are experiencing.

Stress Tolerance

Everyone has a different capacity to deal with stress and anxiety. Some people have, as they say, a short fuse and are unable to tolerate even the smallest amount of stress. This is a pain and misery to everyone around them who has to put up with their limited capacity to manage stress. We can improve our capacity to deal proactively and effectively with stress; we can increase our stress tolerance mechanisms. This requires us to be mature and thoughtful and not indulge ourselves in juvenile expressions of frustration and impatience.

My message is fairly simple – if you want to manage personal stress and reduce workplace stress you have a responsibility to behave in a mature, emotionally intelligent way. I agree with the Harvard research that highly skilled work teams do reflect high group emotional intelligence and are much more productive. I’m also certain that people lucky enough be working in groups with high emotional intelligence and strong interpersonal responsibility have much lower personal stress levels and cope much more effectively with workplace stress.

For more strategies on stress relief refer to some of my other articles:http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Dr_Jeff_Bailey

 

Warm regards

Dr Jeff

For the team at mightydigitaldownloads.com 

Dr Jeff Bailey, psychologist, helps stressed patients. Why put up with stress? Learn stress management skills now.  Click here for the free What is Stress by Dr Jeff. Don’t waste another minute stressed and burnt out. Act now – learn how to relieve stress. 

Are You the Difficult Colleague who Causes Workplace Stress?

Saturday, April 11th, 2009

I enjoy Heidi Klum’s Project Runway. The success of this show was a surprise to Heidi herself and you have to wonder what it is that captures audiences. Is it (a) the diva of design and modeling herself? Is it (b) the impressive credentials of the expert judges? Is it (c) the concept of undiscovered talent – small town gal makes good in the fashion world? Or, sorry to be a bit cynical, but is it (d) the bizarre comments, attitudes and behaviors of the contestants?

The answer is, of course, (d). We have become a community of armchair voyeurs peeking into the lives and behaviors of normal, everyday people. Wait – to be truthful I would have to say that it is a BIG stretch to describe some of the people on reality shows as normal, everyday people. I don’t want to do a personality appraisal but the behavior of many of the reality contestants, inflamed by producers’ desire for high ratings, are outlandish and often disgusting. But that is not the theme of this blog.

I was amused on a recent Project Runway episode to see the amount of attention paid to the attitude of one of the finalists. The episode had more to do with attitude than design. This designer had a serious ‘attitude’ problem and was attracting a lot of negative criticism – not for her design work but for her attitude. She was constantly critical of her peers; put them and their work down at every opportunity; did and said things that made them dislike her; and upset the judges.

One of the obvious characteristics of people who stand out from the workplace crowd for their hostile attitudes is a serious lack of self-awareness. They use a style of defense called external attribution. It is always someone else’s fault that things go wrong; someone else failed to pull their weight; someone else didn’t meet the deadlines’ someone else failed to tell her what was required and when. I’m sure you get the point.

Self-awareness is one element of emotional intelligence, the father of which was Dr Daniel Goleman. EI as it is called, and self-awareness, are two of the most important indicators of successful leadership in an organization. To be healthy, collaborative, and productive in the workplace, we need to be honest with ourselves. We need to objectively audit our strengths and weaknesses. We need to work hard to present a positive and cooperative approach to our colleagues. We need to be an effective contributor on the work team. We must be respectful and courteous of our colleagues.

What happens when you have a person who is unaware of the negativity they bring to the workplace? You have work to do or else this person will stress you out of your mind. You have to develop coping skills that mean that you do not get workplace stress. After all, why should this person cause you personal stress and upset? You have to accept that this is their problem, not yours; you need to maintain a professional and respectful approach to this individual. You need to find their particular strengths and give clear support to these strengths.

To deal effectively with personal stress and workplace stress you have to rise above yourself. You have to understand the problems the stress-causer is experiencing. You have to distance yourself from the person and the stress. You have to take a ‘so-what’ attitude and attend to your own business. The more you invest in the negative, stressful person, the more you will elevate your own stress levels and fail to get stress relief. Don’t be afraid to help them but don’t let them upset your good mood and turn your workplace into stress hell! Good luck!

 

Kind regards

 

Dr Jeff

for thte team at www.mightydigitaldownloads.com 

 

Dr Jeff, a psychologist, writes about workplace stress, personal stress, interpersonal stress, and how to manage stress. On his blog,http://www.drjeffbailey.com, he answers questions from readers. He works hard to make his articles practical and helpful and all of his articles are based on sound research evidence and extensive clinical experience. Please go to his Dr Jeff blog to get your free report on stress.

Volcano Erupts – Stress Explodes

Friday, March 27th, 2009

I write about stress all the time – from a professional point of view but today I write as a ‘victim’ of stress. I am meant to be working with a group of people at Fairbanks but our Volcano ‘god’, Mt Redoubt, is very unhappy. Two large eruptions yesterday, one sending ash up to 66,000 feet, have created chaos. Flights canceled, people rushing to get safety gear for themselves and their houses, trying to find air filters for their vehicles. All of our friends have volcano kits – masks, flashlights, candles, eye protection, plenty of water – and we have to fill up any cracks or holes that might let ash into our house.

All of this adds considerable stress to one’s life – I’m not complaining. Living in Alaska is amazing –  the Iditarod, the snow, the wonderful fishing, the climate, the people. In some strange way, even having to deal with volcanic eruptions adds a touch of spice to life in The Last Frontier.

OK I’m lucky – this is not a huge deal but the situation does create extra stress; it requires me to make quick decisions, contact people, re-arrange timetables. If I can handle stress easily and productively, this will not be problematic. But what if I like predictability and certainty? Then my stress escalates. Anyway, I’ll re-read my articles on managing stress and play the wait-and-see game.

There are two ways to cope with stressors like these. I can focus on my emotions, get upset and worried, grieve about lost opportunities, get anxious about missed opportunities, even get mildly depressed. Emotion focused coping, as it is called, is a useful coping strategy as long as it does not overtake action. I encourage people to honor their emotions, however, we have to do things. I have to email the folk I was meeting; I have to set up alternative technology for what was to be a whole-day seminar. I have to arrange for materials to be emailed. I have to prepare new Powerpoints. I have to work with my team to set up either video conferencing, or Skype, or video share on Elluminate) a web based teaching tool). All of these arrangements require action – the planful, problem solving form of coping.

Oddly enough, both of these are essential coping mechanisms. But, in their own way, each adds a particular form of stress. Emotion focused coping adds internal stress (grieving, worry, anxiety, depression) while problem solving requires creative stress, organizational stress, even an emotional element – will it work?

All of this because the Alaskan volcano god decided to let us know he (or she) was unhappy. OK – so Mt Redoubt is NOT a god – just joking. It really is a vent formed by movement of the earth’s tectonic plates; a vent that permits the escape of gases, ash, and molten rock that reside below the earth’s crust. God or natural force – today it has caused me some additional work stress.

Warm regards

 

Dr Jeff

For the team at Mighty Digital Downloads

PS Get the impact from the Youtube video below!

 

Dr Jeff, a psychologist, writes about workplace stress, personal stress, interpersonal stress, and how to manage stress. On his blog,http://www.drjeffbailey.com, he answers questions from readers. He works hard to make his articles practical and helpful and all of his articles are based on sound research evidence and extensive clinical experience. Please go to his Dr Jeff blog to get your free report on stress.

Victory Gardens – a New Way of Relieving Stress

Saturday, March 21st, 2009

What do you do when times are tough? Look at the current US economy. President Obama is making every effort to revive an economy that is in a downward spiral. Pundits are concerned about not only the current one trillion dollar proposed deficit in the national budget but the prospect of year after year of national deficit. Financial gloom meets us at every corner. Unemployment is increasing – the Bureau of Labor Statistics paints a vivid picture of job losses: “The unemployment rate rose from 7.6 to 8.1 percent, payroll employment has declined by 2.6 million in the past 4 months. The number of unemployed persons increased by 851,000 to 12.5 million in February, and the unemployment rate rose to 8.1 percent.  Over the past 12 months, the number of unemployed persons has increased by about 5.0 million, and the unemployment rate has risen by 3.3 percentage points”.

The newspapers also tell the story: many firms are downsizing or closing their doors. Nokia (dropped 1700 jobs), The Sportsmen’s Warehouse (sold off many of its shops – though not in Alaska!), Caterpillar (5000 jobs), Sprint Nextel (8000), General Motors (2000 jobs), Home Depot (8000 jobs), and even Microsoft is considering job cuts.

All of this is happening at a time when there is widespread outrage at the massive bonuses being paid to AIG executives. Today’s local newspaper gives accounts of public protests, death threats, increased police presence around the homes of wealthy executives in the ‘Gold Coast’ area of New York, warnings to employees not to wear company badges or identification, and so on. Yesterday there was talk about Congress enacting a bill to tax 90% of the AIG bonuses.

All the negative news about unemployment, recession budget deficits, job cuts etc sounds big warning bells, increases anxiety, intensifies feelings of unpredictability, threatens personal security, and elevates personal stress and work stress. Anxiety has many faces but typically we think of situation specific anxiety (e.g., test anxiety) and generalized anxiety. Anxiety is a psychological response to stress. Anxiety can manifest itself in many ways: somatically (bodily or physiological reactions like elevated blood pressure, stomach aches, palpitations, even nausea), emotional reactions (such as irritability, being short tempered, feeling tense), cognitive difficulties (inability to be able to concentrate, short-term memory lapses), and behavioral reactions (engagement in risky physical behaviors, elevated activity levels, or lowered activity).

Charles Spielberger’s early research pointed to two ‘types’ of anxiety – state and trait. Trait anxiety is a long term representation of elevated stress and consequent anxiety, almost a personality characteristic for an individual. State anxiety is short term and reactive. One of his tests of state anxiety will give you an idea of the associated feelings one has with state anxiety. Here are the key emotional terms: calm, secure, tense, regretful, at ease, upset, worried, at ease, anxious, comfortable, self-confident, nervous, jittery, high-strung, relaxed, content, over-excited, rattled, joyful, and pleasant.

Some of these are positive feelings; most are negative. In terms of overcoming the work stress, or worries about being sacked, or not being able to pay your mortgage, or pay for the kids’ college tuition fees, consider some of these words and work out a strategy. Let’s take calm and contented. Sit down with your partner and write down your specific fears. Test these fears to see if there is any evidence that what you are worried about (job loss) might happen. Make a list of all the positive things in your life. Develop a feeling of calmness, contentment and satisfaction. Give thanks for what you have and celebrate your achievements. Put a positive face on the current situation. Get rid of the negative feelings that YOU have created (feeling jittery, tense, upset, high-strung). Note that all of these negative feelings are a result of your failure to put things into perspective and maintain a positive, balanced view of life.

If things are really tough, instead of sweating it, plan for bad times. I like the idea of President Barrack and Michelle and the kids planting a vegetable garden in the White House grounds. During the Second World War people worked on what was called their ‘Victory Gardens’. This is a classic example of finding positive strategies to increase confidence and reduce anxiety – and at a catastrophic time in our history.

I am not trying to diminish the importance of facing the facts and being realistic about job losses and financial challenges. I am trying to put a positive face on the work stress and personal stress so that you deal proactively and effectively with the challenge – and so that you will suppress and eliminate negative self-talk. You CAN control workplace stress and by so doing you can make yourself much less stressed and anxious and more productive and positive. Go out and dig that garden (physically or metaphorically) and you will reduce and relieve stress. Good luck.

Warm regards

 

Dr Jeff

For the team at Mighty Digital Downloads

PS Some neat ideas from the Youtube video below!

 

Dr Jeff, a psychologist, writes about workplace stress, personal stress, interpersonal stress, and how to manage stress. On his blog,http://www.drjeffbailey.com, he answers questions from readers. He works hard to make his articles practical and helpful and all of his articles are based on sound research evidence and extensive clinical experience. Please go to his Dr Jeff blog to get your free report on stress.

Difficult Colleagues can Cause Workplace Stress

Monday, January 26th, 2009

What you often find with these types of people is they have a serious lack of self-awareness. They use a style of defense called external attribution. It is always someone else’s fault that things go wrong; someone else failed to pull their weight; someone else didn’t meet the deadlines’ someone else failed to tell her what was required and when. I’m sure you get the point.

Related to self-awareness is the fascinating concept promoted by Dr Daniel Goleman – emotional intelligence. EI as it is called, and self-awareness, are two of the most important indicators of successful leadership in an organization. To be healthy, collaborative, and productive in the workplace, we need to be honest with ourselves. We need to objectively audit our strengths and weaknesses. We need to work hard to present a positive and cooperative approach to our colleagues. We need to be an effective contributor on the work team. We must be respectful and courteous of our colleagues.

What happens when you have a person who is unaware of the negativity they bring to the workplace? You have work to do or else this person will stress you out of your mind. You have to develop coping skills that mean that you do not get workplace stress. After all, why should this person cause you personal stress and upset? You have to accept that this is their problem, not yours; you need to maintain a professional and respectful approach to this individual. You need to find their particular strengths and give clear support to these strengths.

To deal effectively with personal stress and workplace stress you have to rise above yourself. You have to understand the problems the stress-causer is experiencing. You have to distance yourself from the person and the stress. You have to take a ‘so-what’ attitude and attend to your own business. The more you invest in the negative, stressful person, the more you will elevate your own stress levels and fail to get stress relief. Don’t be afraid to help them but don’t let them upset your good mood and turn your workplace into stress hell! Good luck!

For more strategies on stress relief refer to some of my other articles:http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Dr_Jeff_Bailey

 

Warm regards

Dr Jeff

For the team at mightydigitaldownloads.com 

Dr Jeff Bailey, psychologist, helps stressed patients. Why put up with stress? Learn stress management skills now.  Click here for the free What is Stress by Dr Jeff. Don’t waste another minute stressed and burnt out. Act now – learn how to relieve stress. 

What is it about workplace stress that captures people’s attention?

Wednesday, December 17th, 2008

In the articles I have been writing on stress, I notice that people seem to be more interested in workplace stress than other types of stress. This is perfectly understandable as we have to spend a lot of time at work. In fact, very recent research demonstrates that the average American worker is spending more time at work than ever before. And often without extra remuneration.And, as my colleague Rowena French tells me, weight increases as stress increases!

So what causes stress at work? What is it that makes people anxious, worried, uncertain, unfulfilled, and even depressed? And why do we let work stress overcome our lives and make us miserable? Why do we spend so much time replaying a nasty incident between ourselves and a work colleague or boss? Why do we talk about work so much when we go out to party? Can’t we leave the work pressures and incidents behind and discuss healthier topics?

I know the answers to most of these questions and my first thought is this – it is hard to separate out the different parts of our life so that one does not overlap into the other. Life is about work and work can consume our life. But I also know as a therapist that we bring many of our personal issues to the workplace and this can add to the work stress we are experiencing.

When I used to provide Employee Assistance Counseling a year or two ago, I was amazed to note the research that 76% of the ‘problems’ employees sought to discuss with the organization’s psychologist were NOT work stressors but personal problems. Most therapists, including me, review a constellation of factors when identifying either personal or workplace stress. These include family concerns, finances, addictive behaviors, relationships, and work. We know that many people that we see have failed to develop and maintain a healthy and nurturing life-work balance.

So what is there about work, stress, and life-balance disorders that provide too much tension and too little stress relief? I could provide more than 20 factors in the workplace that can create organizational and personal malaise.

But, in this article, I do not want to list the obvious workplace stressors. Instead, let me tell you the very WORST workplace stressor – it is what YOU tell YOURSELF. Self-talk, the conversations we have with ourselves in our head, is what turns a workplace event into a persistent anxiety or stress. We have hundreds of these internal conversations per day, and guess what – most of them are negative and unproductive.

Negative self talk is extremely dysfunctional. Through our self-talk we convince ourselves that we are incompetent, unattractive, ineffectual, and so many other NOT-GOOD words. A simple event like a sharp or a thoughtless comment from a colleague can lead to critical self-talk, elevated self-criticisms, and a negative mood. The negative mood could be internalized (sad, anxious, worried, fearful, feelings of inadequacy, insecurity, and so on) or externalized (anger, resentment, sharp retorts, criticism, socialized aggression in the form of gossip).

So how do we reduce and relieve stress? How do we stop burnout? How do we halt increasingly low morale? We convert negative thoughts into positive energy and actions. We block these negative thoughts. We replace them with positive and healthy thoughts. Sound simple doesn't it?

We can respond to workplace stress by refusing to engage in negative talk and self-blame. We can interrupt the downward spiral of the self-criticism IF WE WANT TO! Positive thought diminishes negative energy and provides stress reduction and stress relief. For more strategies on stress relief refer to some of my other articles: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Dr_Jeff_Bailey

 

Warm regards

 

Dr Jeff

For the team at mightydigitaldownloads.com 

 Dr Jeff Bailey, psychologist, helps stressed patients. Why put up with stress? Learn stress management skills now.  Click here for the free What is Stress by Dr Jeff. Don’t waste another minute stressed and burnt out. Act now – learn how to relieve stress.